Did Persephone Forget?
Becoming queen of your own underworld
Did Persephone forget like I do that the easy feeling of a summer season must always come to an end? Did she fool herself like I do into thinking she had finally figured out the secret formula of how to stay above forever where the sun shines on her face? Year after year each time the earth opened to swallow her did she claw at the walls and let out a mournful cry? Did she try to negotiate for better terms or look for a way out of her fate? Did Persephone feel like a failure like I always do for not deciphering how to stay forever in the topside world of light and life and laughter? When an impending loss jump starts the torment of every defeat not fully felt when melancholy or anxiety abducts you when your productivity shatters when you are in that place beyond the reach of all your efforts to control or optimize your life do you too make yourself the problem? No one gets out of it, do they? Some too-heavy measure of grief of pain of sorrow that takes you down from time to time reminding you that forces larger than you are a part of this world that we must share space with Reminding you that a beating heart must periodically break and that the breath of life must occasionally sob out its own rhythm that this is the sacred contract inherent in being alive Did Persephone forget like I always do that she was never meant to be in control of this cycle? Meanwhile the earth pulls its energy back into itself for the winter the moon wanes and the nights swell into their dark fullness Meanwhile spring grows as a quiet promise in the belly of the earth not in some heroic defiance of winter but nourished by it brought into being by its surrender to that long passage through the dark How many times did Persephone descend before the panic abated and she stopped looking for a way out? For how many years did she enter the Great Below before she could keep her breath steady and stay with the ache in her chest vibrating with the memory of all she had lost? How long before she knew she could trust that the descent was no punishment and that spring would rise out of this death when the moment was right and bring her with it How many times did Persephone descend to the Underworld before she no longer blamed herself or lost herself in fear? How many seasons was it before she understood before she felt herself to be no longer its victim but finally walked down with her head held high knowing herself as its Queen
I have had a long fascination with the Goddess Persephone. She began tapping on my shoulder during my Saturn Return (around age 27) when I was going through an exceedingly difficult time. Her ability to travel between the worlds, as well as to turn trauma into a kind of triumph fascinated me.
As I understand it, the story that has been passed down to us of Persephone’s abduction by Hades and her being tricked into eating those pomegranate seeds may very well be a veneer from the later stage Classical Greece era that lays over an even older and more ancient story in which she had more agency (I can point you towards a version that takes that approach if you want).
Here, of course, I want to tell you how each year for more than 2,000 years, the story of Demeter and Persephone was enacted in a series of rites and dramatic forms during the Eleusian Mysteries, a secret ritual which every Greek - man and woman, free and enslaved, had to attend at least one in their lives and which is said to have reliably produced profound inner transformation and made people understand the reality of life and death in a new way, but that would be an essay unto itself.
Suffice it to say that for a very, very long time, this story has held deep psychological relevance, and the story of Persephone is one I have turned over and over in my mind for a good many years now.
Each time I start working it (or is it working me?), it teaches me something new and profound; about seasons and cycles, about the mother-daughter relationship, about grief and laughter, about trauma and healing.
This winter when the hard-earned internal steadiness I had been feeling started to wobble yet again, I came back to Persephone.
This poem is the fruits of this most recent exploration with this story.
Thank you, dear ones, for reading.
If this spoke to your heart, if you could relate to the inner seasons and cycles of your own life, I love hearing about it. Leave me a comment below.
With love,
Olivia




Love this so much, Olivia. This winter has proven to be a deep descent for me and have been wandering around, totally lost. Coming back to Persephone and meditating on her journey is such a good practice. Thank you for sharing this piece and your vulnerability ❤️✨️