The Gap Between
A poem about creativity, perfectionism and trust
This poem came though as I sit with the uncomfortable sensation of an interview I gave for a podcast not going as perfectly as I had hoped. My mind was going over and over what I should have said and didn’t. What I said wrong. What I could have said better.
It was a familiar feeling. And one that has held me back from a lot of self expression and creativity in the desire to avoid it.
But as I sat with the heat of the discomfort, some kind of grace came upon me. I grabbed pen and paper, and this poem poured out, as they often do, from a place inside that I think of it as the voice of my soul wanting to teach me something.
This then became the poem that gave me the courage to begin exposing my writing to the world, and that inspired starting this substack.
One note. It is part of my spiritual practice to try to relate to Life and to Reality on a more personal, intimate level. To do so, it helps me to use Her instead of “It”.
So, if you’ve ever held yourself back because of fear of how something will turn out, this is for you.
If you’ve ever suffocated what could be the joy of accomplishment with neurosis and worry, this is for you.
If you’ve struggled with perfectionism, this is for you.
What if you gave up the illusion of perfection
that hiding your gifts allows?
What if the gap between the ideal in your head
and what is made manifest
when you bring something into the world
is a sacred thing?
What if what you call imperfection
is the remnant
of your entwining with Her?
The mark of where Reality touched you
The evidence of your partnership?
What if it is the medal of bravery for services rendered
when you chose to not leave an idea or inspiration
in the cold realm of the disincarnate
where it could stay seemingly perfect
but birthed it
- with all the struggle and holy mess that birth always is -
into the world
and allowed it to become
something real.
Do not disparage that gap between
the unmanifested ideal
and the art, the project, the words
that have now been given life by you.
This is the gap where something mysterious and sacred dwells.
Like the artist with a vision who begins to paint
trying with each brushstroke to get as close as possible
to something flawless
But he is not painting alone.
For Reality Herself kisses the artists hand
moves it slightly every time it touches canvas.
Reality puts Her stamp on it too.
This partnership
this lovemaking
is the dance of creation.
Do not forsake it
for sterile perfection.
Trust that Her contribution
is exactly what is needed.
With Love,
Olivia Wilder
If this moved or inspired you in any way, I’d love to hear about it below.
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